Perplexed With Confidence

Have you ever gotten some news that completely threw a wrench into your plans? Or have something happen in your life and all you can do is ask why?

I have many times. It seems that every time I have a plan for the direction of my life, something happens that either prevents or delays my ability to enforce my plans. There are times when it just seems like everything in my world is going haywire and I get confused. Confused because no matter how deep I think my faith is, it's always easy for me to question God. Confused because I don't always see a way out. When I don't know what to expect next, my natural human reactions are fear, worry, and doubt.

Last night, I learned a nugget of information that's a major life changer for me. My initial reaction was fear. Then worry. Then denial. Back to fear. The worry carried on through the night. I woke up every hour. Hundreds of thoughts running through my head. How? Why? What will happen if...? Scenarios of how this will all play out. How will this affect my family? How this will interrupt my plans. I allowed my thoughts to torture me all night long.

Until this morning...God brought me the perfect scripture at the perfect time. 2 Corinthians 4:7-10. It's a verse many of us are familiar with. I'll let you read it in your own time, but for now, the part that caused me to discard my worried thoughts was verse eight: "we are hard pressed on everyside, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair"

To be perplexed is to be filled with uncertainty. That I was and still am. I don't understand why this is happening. The timing couldn't be more wrong for me. I can't possibly see with my human eyes how this will play out. I have many questions, all of which are unaswered. I hate not knowing. I'm the person who will ask a million questions because I have a really hard time dealing with not knowing things. I don't take many risks because I always think in terms of the fear of the unknown.

As I grow older and am raising children, I'm learning life is full of perplexities. But just because we are filled with uncertainty, doesn't mean we have to be in despair.  To despair is to lose hope or confidence. This tells me that since I have the power of God working for me, no matter how confused or perplexed I am, I don't have to lose my hope or confidence in God. As a believer in Christ, I have been given the supernatural gift to be able to have confidence in Him and His ability and desire to make every situation in my life work out for my good, to my benefit. I have the awesome privilege to give all my questions, confusion, doubt, and worry to God, knowing that he'll give me the information I need when I need it. I can exchange my yolk for His. At this very moment, it feels like a ton of bricks have been lifted from my shoulders. I don't have to give up hope. No matter how this turns out, regardless of what anyone thinks or says, I can and will hold on to the hope that God's perfect will for my life is better than my plans for my life and there are great things waiting for me and my family.

At this moment, I give it all to God. I trust God to handle this situation in a manner that is in my best interest. I'm not going to worry. I don't have to worry, because I know God has already worked this out for me. Today I'm going to go to the farmers market, go to a new grocery store and shop for food, clear out the clutter in my house in prepartion for the new year, take an afternoon nap with my favorite girls, eat and catch up on my fav tv shows. I'm going to do all those things without worrying because my Bible tells me I don't have to despair. So, I won't. This shall be a worry free day. Tonight I will rest, peacefully. Today, tomorrow, and God willing, the days after, I will hope and believe with confidence in the wonderous power of my God.